The Answers for Everything Podcast

Faked it until you maked it

Teapot and Mr. Clay sit back and share the advice that they gained by simply watching or listening to someone during their time of need.
From garlic bread and cupcakes to weight based beauty perception, they reveal what caused them to have an epiphany in this pretty personal episode
Questions that get answered this week:
What did Teapot learn from Mr. Clay while she was a teenager?
Did Mr. Clay’s ex-coworker name a sex move after himself?
What important info did Mr. Clay learn about pie eating?
How can you pull off wearing a fedora that doesn’t match anything that you own?
 
 “Nobody will be inspired by what we do”
-Teapot-

The Manning Park Marmot

Boys will be boys.
Charlie Ray and Mr. Clay discuss embarrassing stories of self gratification, selling door to door religion, adulting, stripper payments, Elvis Presley and Imax movies. Somehow, they have the knack to connect all of these topics into one seamless episode. Cover your ears if you get embarrassed or offended.
Questions that get answered this week:
What did Mr. Clay and his friends do on the Manning Park marmot statue?
What is the best use of a bedroom door frame?
What does Charlie Ray think Canadian porn is like?
What is the reason why Mr. Clay thinks that he lives in the wrong place?
 “Nobody will be inspired by what we do”
-Teapot-

Two lonely dudes in a hotel room

Charlie Ray and Mr. Clay talk about how they first met while giving the audience a little insight into attending toy and comic conventions. They discuss convention cost cutting, the odor of comic and toy nerds and hot girls who like G.I Joe. Using excellent descriptive words, Mr. Clay teaches Charlie Ray the inner workings of the Double Dutch rudder.
 
Questions that get answered this week:
What was the fear that Mr. Clay and Charlie Ray’s spouses had upon the boy’s first meeting?
What is one of Mr. Clay’s favorite movies?
Which factory in Kansas City shut down?
Why did Charlie Ray not attend a convention in New Orleans?
 “Nobody will be inspired by what we do”
-Teapot-

Can I get some opossum ass?

The episode started out as two grown men talking about action figures somehow ended up as a conversation about road trips and the bathroom activities of Canadians as they try to digest gas station food from the USA.
Listen up as Charlie Ray and Mr. Clay share details of their first road trip together; chatting about elusive snacks, KFC offerings in the Midwest, the outlaw Jesse James, getting lost in Athens Greece and how one wrong turn had a young white kid from Missouri driving straight into Compton. (see what we did there?)
Questions that get answered this week:
Where can you find the meat equivalent of a fruitcake?
Who exactly is Pee Pee Du Fromage?
Why is it important to keep toilet paper in your vehicle?
What is known as “The Bellingham”?
“Nobody will be inspired by what we do”
-Teapot-

Swinger’s paradise

This week Mr. Clay sits back and relaxes as Charlie Ray goes into detail of his years swinging in the Midwest. The hosts touch on dating apps, divorce, prostate orgasms, penis pumps and mechanical sex machines. Charlie Ray gives a shout out to the wonderful soccer mom who invited him into her dark world and put him on the path to the Tantric master he has become.
Questions that get answered this week.
Is your ex-wife the best candidate as your date to a sex party?
What is the best thing about dating an equestrian?
What is the one thing that Charlie Ray never experienced in all of his sexual encounters?
What do you hope to see when driving around at night in a scary, industrial part of town?
“Nobody will be inspired by what we do”
-Teapot

I’m not a human trafficker

Empathy: Do you have enough? Do you have too little? What exactly is it? Teapot and Mr. Clay discuss his lack of empathy and how it affects his life and those around him (Shocker! People tend to think that he is an asshole).
The hosts discuss their love language, their mental health and the concept of “meeting people where they are at”. Somehow this subject takes them through stories of broken fast food milkshake machines, Teapot’s constant need for verbal reassurance and the most effective way to argue with anybody.
Questions that get answered this week:
Is Teapot a human trafficker?
How does Mr. Clay show appreciation to employees?
What are the dangers of hanging out on the edge of a slip and slide?
How does spring weather in the prairies make Teapot’s life difficult?
“Nobody will be inspired by what we do”
-Teapot-

The gates of Hell

Wanna feed an elephant, attend a music festival and then go to the 6 floor, Rote Haus? Charlie Ray did these things on his many trips to Germany. Follow the musical journey that Charlie Ray has been on since he was a teenager. From starting his own fanzine to hanging backstage with Motörhead, he has stories for years. Listen as we discuss porn sounds blasting out of car stereos, priests attending rock shows, our favorite bands and some of our favorite concert trips.
Questions that get answered this week:
Who is Charlie Ray’s 2nd favorite band?
What pop singer does Shirley Manson love?
What did Mr. Clay and his friend Jeff leave inside a rental car in Vegas?
How much money has Charlie Ray’s concert experiences cost him?
“Nobody will be inspired by what we do”
-Teapot-

The Amsterdam fruit salad on Bloedstraat

To share the hosting duties this week, the AFE podcast beams in a special guest from Kansas City.
Many of you know him as a radio DJ, tantric massage professional and expert concert goer but that just scratches the surface when it comes to the enigma which is Charlie Ray.
Listen to the hosts reveal their darkest secrets when Charlie Ray and Mr. Clay play a game of 20 questions. The ground covered this week ranges from Tower whorehouses in Germany, Bloedstraat in Amsterdam, toilet paper in Azerbaijan, weed dispensaries, prostate massages and the secret recordings of the Playboy mansion grotto. Charlie Ray finishes the show by giving a teaser on what to expect when getting a tantric massage.
 
Questions that get answered this week:
What is the ideal penis size? (according to women surveyed)
Who would Mr. Clay love to model his ideal life from?
How many orgasms are possible in just under an hour?
How many G.I Joe figures does Charlie Ray own?
“Nobody will be inspired by what we do”
-Teapot-

Sorry for the cliffhanger

Welcome back Knowitalls. This week we hear the conclusion to last episode’s cliffhanger. Teapot informs Mr. Clay that after he has some edibles he is a way better listener than host. Enjoy as Mr. Clay’s mom gives a review on a porn clip, which of course leads Teapot to establish just how different their two families are. Lastly they discuss outhouse mysteries, Chucky dolls, eye surgery and why they never seem to shut up.
Questions that get answered this week:
What message did Clay’s mom insist that he text to his Aunt?
What ruins Teapot’s day?
What is only 50% shaved on Clay’s body?
What is Teapot’s biggest fear in life?
“Nobody will be inspired by what we do”
-Teapot-

I’m willing to sell out my gender

The hosts have been apart for 3 weeks now and have to cover a lot of ground. Stay tuned for the 1st part of this two-part episode.
Listen as Teapot eats some lucky charms, cookie batter and Mr. Clay chows down on some air-fried, pad Thai, tofu.
Their chat about vegetarians turns into a discussion on deep frying pork fat then dipping it in chocolate (Ukrainian Salo).
Find out how easy it is to transition from talk about cereal to talk about porn with Mr. Clay’s mom.
 
Questions that got answered this week:
Is there a correlation between vegan items and the items found on the discount section of a grocery store?
How many White Spot or Triple O’s burgers did Mr. Clay eat in 24 hours?
What beverages did Mr. Clay pay way too much money for at Disneyland?
What is Teapot’s favorite cereal?
What is Teapot willing to sell out her gender for?
What porn video did Mr. Clay send to his mom?
Did she actually watch it?
“Nobody will be inspired by what we do”
-Teapot-

Clay’s prostate exam (and other shit talk)

It’s another “Shoot the shit” episode but this time there is a special guest. Dora stopped in with some homemade cookies and to thank her, we eat almost all of them (perhaps we had the munchies?)
The show started off with some information on Farting apps which turned into an in depth discussion on Mr. Clay’s last prostate exam.
Our guest enjoyed a game of “would you rather” with choices involving wearing your dad’s underwear, farting at inconvenient times, man diapers and kissing your own cousin. Stick around to learn how Clay’s mom takes center stage in our “choose your own” threesome discussions
 
Questions that got answered this week:
 
When is the worst time to fart at a funeral?
What made Dora feel like she got knocked in the face with a baseball bat?
What part of Lin Manuel Miranda does Teapot want rubbed off onto her?
Which character from Friends would we all kill if we had to?
 
“Nobody will be inspired by what we do”
-Teapot-

The orgy we all craved

Welcome back Knowitalls. This week, the hosts do a retrospect on strange news stories from 2020. Sit back and enjoy news about Hungarian orgies, demon semen, crotch bashing Kung-Fu, ice cream that makes you gay and last but certainly not least... a Danish child’s television program that stars a man with a prehensile penis.
Conversation tangents:  White house diet coke button, Key lime pie blizzard, Mr. Clay banging all 7 billion people on Earth and how generic drugs compare to brand name drugs.
Questions that get answered this week:
Is asking for equality, asking for too much?
How does a drag queen tuck?
How do the teachers in Denmark teach sex education?
Do the hosts think that Bernie Sanders is awesome?
 
“Nobody will be inspired by what we do”
-Teapot-

I have 2 feet so I can get diabeetus twice

Happy new year Knowitalls.
This week the hosts get all nostalgic about 2020 and talk about all the good things that they enjoyed throughout the year. There is so much negativity in the world that they decided that they would focus on positive vibes instead. As much as Covid-19 tried to beat the hope out of them, it failed. It came close… but in the end, it ultimately failed.
Sit down, put in those ear pods and take a ride through rapid covid testing, airline refunds, hazelnut spread, free Reese’s merch, French toast, naked Nintendo, Japanese Christmas dinners and the use of long tongues to pleasure people.
It only took until 2020 but Teapot finally started (yep… first timer’s club) to watch every theatrical Star Wars movie and she finished it all up by crying at the finale of The Mandalorian.
After a unique year, it has been decided that the best parts were related to Ted Lasso, The Mandalorian, air fried food and the luxury of not catching the ‘Vid.
 
“Nobody will be inspired by what we do”
-Teapot-

Do you know who I am?

Part 2 with special guest Dora Cote continues with lots of talk about food.  Which for obvious reasons will see the hosts and guest venture down a deep and dark tunnel filled with lovely ramblings about David Attenborough, only fans pages, The backdoor surprise (also known as the Plumber’s special), Mt Rushmore, Blueberry Hostess pies, eating at buffets, making life-long friends, the Cheetos promotion at KFC, chicken and waffles breakfast cereal and finally they discuss The “Fuck you Dale” tax.
Teapot and Mr. Clay sat silently while biting their nails as Dora gave reviews on the items that they cooked for her prior to recording. SPOILER: It turns out that the hosts don’t suck at cooking.
Questions that get answered this week:
Does Passion feed a 17 year old?
What is the one aspect of cooking that Dora didn’t understand before she got on the show?
What is the worst cooking term ever?
What was Papa Smurf’s original name?
What is the secret ingredient in Dora Cote’s Pie crust?
What is a piecaken?
What are Dora’s 5 meals that she can’t live without?
What is the secret ingredient in old school Hostess pies?
What’s the worst thing that Dora ever cooked?

Women with wieners

This week Dora Cote stops by to talk about what drives her to create mouth watering desserts and how it got her a reoccurring spot on MasterChef Canada. Teapot and Mr. Clay prepared some food for Dora in the hopes of getting rave reviews and in turn, she brought cookies that cemented her reputation as a baking Wizard.
Hit play and learn what inspires them to cook, learn about Mr. Clay’s friend who sends him pics of meaty turds and learn what a cucamelon is.
Questions that get answered this week:
What four W’s is Teapot all about?
Why should every USA border guard just hop in and road trip with Mr. Clay and Teapot?
What is better than soup and a biscuit?
What is the difference between a Turducken and a Tofucken?
One final note: Fuck you, Dale

Dry ass pork chops

Lots of ground was covered this week, some of it might be too explicit so cover your innocent ears.
If you dare to enjoy the obscene and ridiculous, jump right in on some discussion on Kevin Hart standup, James Gunn tweets and the Depp VS Heard allegations. Enjoy 30 minutes of entertainment as Mr. Clay, The Gelman and Teapot chat about Lentils in spaghetti sauce, Grimes the artist, Dry ass pork chops, “Baby” Yoda being 50 years old, Uncle Ben and last but not least Aunt Jemima and Taylor Swift.
Questions that get answered this week:
Is judgment on today’s societal norms fair when judging actions from a person or company from 50 years ago at a time when those norms were very different?
Are people allowed to change?
If baby Yoda (Grogu, AKA The Child) is 50 years old, is it considered a child if pertaining to explicit adult activities?
How boring is a cheese pizza?
What is the difference between flirting and touching?
Which words should be removed from the English language?

Do you guys wanna dock?

Welcome back Knowitalls. This week we sit down with the Gelman and talk about names that we associate with attractiveness and what makes them hot. There is a quick journey into online dating apps while we all ponder why men always have profile pics of themselves holding a fish or why they find the need to just show a picture of their lifted truck in their gallery.
Teapot coaches as Mr. Clay and Gelman attempt to dock while they all contemplate if this would constitute as a threesome. Teapot gets to learn what the Snyder cut is while Mr. Clay learns about Gelman’s love of Twin Peaks.
 
Questions that get answered this week:
What male celebrities make us wet?
What is Teapot ashamed of?
Are Pedro Pascal, Pablo Escobar and Ivan Pavlov the same person?
What kind of woman Teapot is attracted to?
Which men will Mr. Clay give himself to if they were to walk into his room?
What percentage of the cast of Black Panther is on Teapot’s celebrity crush list?

Get to work bitches

This week we get to the core of what makes for a memorable hotel/hostel experience. The adventure begins with tales of drinking hot, shower water, and technology getting the best of Mr. Clay’s mom yet somehow ends with us discussing that Donald Trump is made up of USA instead of DNA (he truly is a specimen).
          Learn about the awesomeness of Mexican hostels, the symphony of snores and why you have to shower in Pairs while staying at the Flying Pig (downtown) hostel in Amsterdam.
 
Questions that get answered this week:
Instead of shower beers, can you have shower Oreos?
What image did Mr. Clay’s mom keep as her phone background while travelling through Europe?
In European hostels, what exactly does “Queen sized bed” mean?
What country has a Hostel that is directly above a McDonalds and its ever pungent deep fryer exhaust?
Where can you stay if you want hookers to beat down the adjoining room door while their pimp brandishes a gun and yells at them from the street?

I don’t know about Jaws 5

          Good evening Knowitalls. We are in spooky season and that means that we have a bonus, Halloween-type episode for you this week. The Gelman dropped by in order to discuss horror movies with us and we recorded the whole thing; even when he went to the bathroom. He talks to us about what to expect and not expect when it comes to the horror genre and why he loves it. We promise you that he is as close to an expert in horror as one can get without getting an actual degree in it (we have not fact checked that statement so if we are wrong, we apologize)
          Other than horror films, we learn a little about 1000 island dressing, well done steaks with ketchup and the difference of dressing up for Halloween in the prairies VS the rest of Canada. Oh yeah, we discuss a Werewolf story as well.
Questions  that get answered this week:
How many Jaws sequels are there?
Does Jaws wear a leather jacket and sunglasses?
What is the perfect meal that can be ordered at all restaurants?
What movie made the Gelman cry?
Can Mr. Clay combine an Irish accent with a Korean accent without sounding racist?

The Venus flytrap penis

Welcome back Knowitalls. This week we teach you about packing carry-on bags for short or even long trips. Somehow this leads into a discussion on how Mr. Clay smuggled vibrators and dirty black gloves through security (for others, of course). Feel free to soak in all of the goodness when the hosts talk about the movie “Tusk”, how French people laugh, taking Mexican vacations and the usage of Polysporin VS iodine.
Questions that get answered this week:
Does teapot have a valid passport?
Why does Teapot wake up in a cold sweat in the middle of the night?
What security line does Clay consistently experience at the airport?
How many hats has Clay lost in Norway?
What do Odo and Quark’s genitals look like?
Why does Clay have green, liquid poop?

Put on that see-through shirt

Glorious travel plans meet immense travel misfortune in this week’s episode. There have been hints about the lost luggage Eurotrip but this week the whole story gets exposed. Listen up to hear about Scottish castles, bleeding thighs, Air France’s lack of customer service and some firsthand experience in witnessing Paris rioting after the world cup. We talk about see through shirts, ass sweat, bladder infections and Bastille Day.
 
Questions that get answered this week:
How big was the kidney stone that Clay peed out?
If we smelled bad when visiting Paris, would anyone notice?
What fireworks display makes the Disney ones look like garbage?
How much swass could Teapot and Mr. Clay collect on a hot day in Paris?
When did AirFrance message Teapot back in regard to her luggage claim?
Do Teapot’s boyfriend and Clay compare dong sizes?

Diet like a homeless person

Good afternoon Knowitalls. This week things are done a little bit differently as we bring you a bonus show with 3 unaired clips from previous episodes. These clip didn’t work with the flow of their respected episodes but ironically; they work well when they are all edited together. 
Teapot and Mr. Clay get into 3 topics then as usual they very quickly veer off in the opposite direction. The show starts with some talk about going to the gym, which leads into what food utensils are good for butt stuff (obviously) and then the show concludes with some salad and potato recipes that are designed to keep your boyfriend home and craving your food. No hidden meanings there… food actually means food and recipes actually mean recipes.
 It’s time to learn about teenage girls using the gym strictly for their instagram stories, Teapot’s time management skills, the difference in egg storage between North America and Europe and to wrap things up you get to hear about why Teapot’s trainer asked her to go all James Bond/Black Widow at the gym.
 
Questions that get answered this week are:
Who is a better cook? Teapot or her boyfriend?
Is your diet as strict as a homeless person’s diet?
Does Teapot have 2 gall bladders?
Who doesn’t pay attention to medical surgery follow-up?
Could a meat tenderizer or a whisk be a good sex toy?
How long would Clay’s mom stand outside of the gym before asking for help? Nobody truly knows because she lined up last month and is still there.

I would like a nipple extension

This week is all about the frequency of WTF moments that Teapot and Mr. Clay seem to experience. These moments range from lighting a man on fire, almost being kidnapped in Amsterdam (3 times on the first day, nonetheless), watching a grown man drag a child down the street in the middle of the night and last but not least, a very special moment when your friend’s girlfriend tries to give you a handy while you are all together at the movies.
Get ready to learn about nipple extensions, robot hotel kiosks in Germany, automated hot food vending machines in Amsterdam, the Gelman, Teapot’s friendly face and step moms who need to be consoled after their husbands cheat on them. Mr. Clay gets a well deserved, long time coming reality check when he learns that everyone around him always feels wildly uncomfortable whenever he opens his mouth. Even his text messages cause people to cover their phone before they read them just in case a supervisor is within viewing capacity.
If you are ready for some bad advice on how to solve family problems in regard to cheating dads then you need to press PLAY right now.
Questions that get answered this week:
Is getting a handy considered cheating?
Is the random stranger from Amsterdam related to teapots mom?
Why Is Teapot’s friend a ghost?
What is every woman’s dream?
Who owns Amsterdam?
Why would someone ever say “Fuck it, free mints”?
What situation calls for sneaking jacket-less and barefoot out of a window into -40 temperatures in the hopes that your shoes and Jacket are not stolen from the apartment hallway?

I’m sorry about your penis

Another “Shoot the shit” episode with the hosts answering some “would you rather” questions and then telling some personal stories. Follow along as Teapot has an epiphany on dick pics, cringes at the thought of chewing on tin foil and decides on what her specialty would be if she did a webcam show. Mr. Clay will discuss where his grade 11 yearbook went and why it disappeared in the first place. Believe it or not but Mr. Clay does impressions; and this week he introduces you to his imitation of an older, Greek woman who tells her son to not let Mr. Clay turn him gay. #truetolifestory
Questions that get answered this week:
Shaggy - Was it him?
If Clay only had taste buds in his butt. What would he do?
While highway driving, can you get a girl’s number from a moving vehicle if your car is plastered with Porn pictures?
Would Clay choose butt stuff with a girl celebrity or butt stuff with a guy celebrity?
What did the Swiss man say to Mr. Clay’s mom when he looked over and saw the cucumber penis?
Where is the most inappropriate place to pretend to make sweet, sweet love to your friend’s butt while in public?

I always use the glory hole in Fantasyland for that

*DISCLAIMER* there is no confirmation about the existence of that glory hole as Mr. Clay has looked for about 30 years now and has yet to find it. He will continue to search relentlessly until his dying days
Last week’s cliffhanger finally gets resolved this episode. Listen up and pay close attention as there are quite a few stories bundled up into this week’s episode. The hosts banter back and forth about seeing celebrities such as Johnny Depp, Tom Hanks, Tim Allen and Nicholas Cage while visiting the Disneyland Park. Take a half hour out of your day as you sit back, relax and listen to Mr. Clay and Teapot discuss Club 33 and Jay from entertainment 1. Last but not least, get ready to visualize a Shirtless Weber walking around Disneyland kicking ass and taking names (except for the short break he took while spending time in Walt Disney’s private, Disneyland office)
 
Every week the title is chosen using a quote from the recording. Here are the 2 runners up:
“Hey, do you want a handjob?”
“I’m trying to fucking grow a snake head”
Those two suggestions didn’t quite paint a Disneyland experience in a positive light like the chosen title does.
Questions that get answered this week:
Would it kill the Toon Town coaster operator to stay at work for an extra minute and a half?
Why is Mr. Clay not invited to family picnics?
How many times did a homeless man get mistaken for Mr. Clay’s dad?
Can Teapot teach us all what a Foley artist is?
Why would Epstein never stay in a hostel?
Can Mr. Clay give his mom a heart attack by simply going to the bathroom at the Seattle airport?

My first time is your best time

Welcome back knowitalls. This week is the first part of a 2 part episode centered on Disney trip adventures. Teapot and Mr. Clay try to be humble and not come across as stuck up while revisiting their astounding amount of Disney vacations. It would seem that some of their park experiences helped shape them into who they are today. They will bring you stories about the Box “O” Pop, buying Britney Spears dolls, pasta out the asshole (literally?) and a delightful tale about a 9 year old girl (not Epstein related) story from the Finding Nemo ride in Disneyland Paris.
Every week the title is chosen using a quote from the recording.
Here is this week’s runner up: “Come on guys, it’s not like you’re going on a fucking Merry-go-round”.  Let us know if we made the right decision in naming the episode.
Questions that get answered this week:
 
Is it ok to lie to your friends about 4X4ing in rented Hummers, even though you know it will break their heart?
Was it water or spit coming out of the hotel shower head?
Is it racist to call your new Spanish friend “Pedro” even before asking him what his actual name is?
What can be like 16 orgasms at once?
When someone says “America” what should be the next two words out of your mouth?
Why is cheesecake for breakfast a staple when going to Disneyland?
Is Disneyland best described as “the fair on the best steroids that money can buy”?

I’ve seen the inside of my Dad’s butt

No Guest hosts this week as we have the OG crew in the studio!
After a week apart, Teapot and Mr. Clay are at it again with some delicious storytelling about Jeffrey Epstein, camping with lots of family members while also having anxiety and they throw out some advice on driving through Death Valley. There is also some not so delicious discussion on Dad buttholes. Clearly the butthole discussion is not about the butthole of Clay’s Dad because tracking him down would take the skills of Sherlock Holmes, Batman and Google all working together for the task at hand. Bets have been made as to which Liquor store, Milk section or cigarette counter he may be hiding at. Sit back, close your eyes, open your ears (??) and take in all of the quality conversation this episode has to offer.
Be prepared as you get introduced to the myth known only as “Judetastic”, Cousin Bleh from drawn together makes for a small topic and get ready to learn why Mr. Clay gets very jealous that Teapot saves money cuz her dad “knows a guy”. Sadly, the guy that Teapot’s dad “knows” has nothing to do with dad butts. Rest assured if he did, Mr. Clay would keep him on retainer.
Questions that get answered this week are:
Is it possible to do a road trip to Las Vegas and Anaheim but never see the strip or even set foot in Disneyland?
How does a 2 Storey outhouse work?
Where did Epstein get his money from? J/K…. they can’t answer that.
What does Teapot’s dad use his “I know a guy” guy for?
Was Mr. Clay 14 years old while in grade 5?
Did Teapot date a 5th grader when she was 21?

My pullout game is weak, Starring Randy Marsh

With Teapot on vacation and Mr. Clay running out of options, literally asking 103 different people to record a show this week, desperate measures had to be made. Sliding into the guest host position is none other than The Real Randy Marsh. Randy and Clay have a connection due to their past lives as born and Bred BC boys who ended up relocating to the prairies for work. This week the discussion revolves around that bond as well as a few stories about the mythical beast known as Weber, the BC ferries corporation, orange juice ads featuring lesbians, why Clay’s boss told him to “please get the fuck back to work” and although the Japanese word Kabuki and the Greek word Chabookie (tsibouki) sound alike, they mean 2 completely different things. One means blowjob… can you guess which one?
Some questions get answered such as:
Is ass the other vagina?
Why do people stuff their front grill with cardboard?
How did a Futureshop sale of 3 CD’s for $10 lead Randy to his new life?
What position did the head of HR offer Randy? (It wasn’t Doggystyle positiion)
Are pants optional while recording with Randy?
Why should you never let a handicapeable friend use a pressure washer?
Can you break a keg?
Did Clay ever work for Weber inc?
Did Weber inc really exist?
Was Randy Marsh ever a Milkman? And if he was, did he work for Weber inc?

Papa Smurf would be so tight

Lucky number thirteen (Insert air horn celebration here, woot woot!)
There isn’t really a theme this time around so dive in for some random chit chat about Dwayne Johnson going to pound town on Teapot (no relation to the Dollar store in the UK), listen to Teapot decide why she would marry her own mother and then discover exactly what she finds appealing about her grade 9 math teacher (It’s not his math skills… if you know what I mean???). To make this episode a solid 22 minutes of entertainment, there is a snippet about roommates that touch themselves in front of people, a quick story about Mr. Clay’s rancid smelling farts and a revelation that “to-go” meals that are 100% entirely made up of cake are probably the greatest meal ever. Mr. Clay regrettably sounds a little racist when makes fun of how is friend sounds when she speaks Tagalog in front of him. (All joking of course)
There are no listener questions this week but everyone will learn answers to the following questions:
As a university student, can you live off meth and cake?
Is opening one door and 3 windows going to be enough to air out the rancid smelling farts that Mr. Clay allegedly used to produce? Used to… not anymore. Nowadays they smell like candy. The good kind of candy, not the black licorice types of candy.
When your computer dies, can you access Facebook photo albums or are they gone forever? Every person on the planet knows the answer to this one. Or do they?
Are there any foreign languages that sound like chickens clucking?
Will Mr. Clay’s mom ever understand technology?
Did Teapot need her dorm room bathroom to be wheelchair accessible?
When Teapot’s roommate got deported, should she have finished her ice cream before or after she consoled them? Marijuana may have been a factor for this answer.

Your face is a f**king carnival

Episode 12: Your face is a fucking carnival
Welcome back friends. This episode starts with stupid stories from our younger years and concludes with personal stories about doing magic mushrooms. The main talking points are related to high school skylight messages, night driving on magic mushrooms, Hansel and Gretal-ing with toilet paper, taking a leak on your friend’s lawn and also learning the nicest possible way to egg someone’s car. Get ready to discover how breathing can control your bathroom plunger and let your imaginations soar as Teapot gives us a detailed blueprint to her parent’s basement. (You will need those blueprints in order to avoid the sad room, the scary crawlspace and the bathroom that turns your pee green)
Answers and questions, questions and answers!!
Can you forget how to swallow?
Why did Mr. Clay’s car make a collect call?
After dating someone for a week, should you marry them?
Should you cheat on your boyfriend with your high school crush?
Why did someone threaten to throw a log of firewood through Mr. Clay’s windshield?
Why did Teapot call Mr. Clay a piece of shit?
Is $43.50 too much to pay for a lanyard?
Do sex and drugs blend well together?
Is Teapot’s friend the Devil?
Why did Mr. Clay hide on the roof of the Husky Restaurant for over an hour?

I could definitely rub a dude’s dick with a broomstick

Welcome back Knowitalls. This week Teapot and Mr. Clay discuss if money can in fact buy happiness. The episode begins with them pondering the stress of having too much VS not having enough money. Teapot reminisces about her teenage years when she lacked the need to curb her spending habits. They both get confused on the rules of a Genie’s 3 wishes but then on the other hand they are not confused with the idea that blowing dudes would lead to amazing vacations. Many, many questions get answered this week;
What isn’t a normal monthly budget for booze?
What exactly would Mr. Clay do for $20?
Does Teapot still love Tokio Hotel, Metrostation and skinny jeans?
Where is your sweet spot for your wealth?
Is Teapot forced at gunpoint to record with Mr. Clay while they talk about weird shit?
While perusing the Australian Facebook classified ads for sexual fantasies, what would $5000 get you?
Why does Mr. Clay want to move to Alabama?
What is more important: Getting lots of the dick in your expensive, private residence or living for free with your parents but getting very little to no dick at all? (Blood relative dick excluded, of course)

Your mouth is sticking with all the goo

Welcome back Knowitalls. This week the topic is FOOD. We talk about when we shop, what we buy, what we definitely don’t buy and what food staples we keep in our houses. The stories take place from our trips abroad, from local shopping and also from family favorite meals. Have you ever gone on a limited edition, Reese’s Peanut butter cup scavenger hunt? Mr. Clay has. (Wanna hear all about it? Click the play button). If you would like to see some of the unique items found by Mr. Clay on his adventures then check out his instagram page @funkytreats.
Stay tuned to get answers to the following questions.
How many meals can coffee be a substitute for?
Why does Teapot claim that she has a sack?
What does ketchup belong on?
When dining at McDonald’s, what would constitute a “Manager situation”?
Does Teapot miss the meat?
Why did Mr. Clay get an erection in the middle of the recording?
Was the KFC: Cheetos Chicken sandwich worth a 12 hour drive?

Yes that is arousing, I do like the nightstick

Episode 9 Brings Mr. Clay and Teapot to the realization that they speed more than they don't. They discuss if luck plays a part in what happens when you get pulled over and Mr. Clay takes a little journey down memory lane to the time he asked a cop to pose with him while flashing gang signs. The discussions all begin with the love for the Autobahn, the importance of playground zones in -50 weather and blowing dudes at stop signs. The adventure reaches its finale when they discuss The difficulties in paying European speeding tickets while not being a resident and how Mr. Clay was close to being caught while performing the duties of a drug mule. The big questions this week relate to how delightful a prison in Amsterdam could be and how fast one of them had to be driving to get a $351.00 speeding ticket.

French underwear (Super tiny or I have huge testicles)

Episode 8: This week Teapot and Mr. Clay get all down and dirty with some talk on women's lingerie and men's French underwear. They answer questions on who wears these articles, when they wear them and if it's sexy to shower while wearing them. Along the journey they rehash the grey sweatpants theory from a few episodes ago and discuss if a roller derby girl's uniform is the sexy fetish of many men. Mr. Clay learns that a woman who doesn't cry in sad movies isn't a cyborg (he is still trying to wrap his head around that one.) The big question for the week is all about Mr. Clay's testicles (yes, despite his sleigh riding accident during grade 9, they are still referred to as plural)

I heard it open the knife drawer

We're back with Episode 7 (one of my personal favorites so far). Teapot and I dig deep into our memories to places of spooky experiences and unexplained phenomena. We explore situations from our youth that seem to give us more questions than answers. Turn off the lights, sit alone in your basement and be very, very aware of every little creak and moan that your house has to offer during your listen of this episode. Don't be afraid of the shadows, they can't hurt you (or maybe they can? Or even scarier... what if they are you, but trying to break free from a parallel dimension?) Goblins, shadowmen, ghostly footsteps of children from the other side, reincarnation and perhaps the answer to "Who or what is God?" are the subject matter this week.  

I should never be introduced to Elizabeth Hurley

Episode 6 is all about quarantine boredom (or freedom, depending on your profession). We get into a little game of "Would you rather" and learn where we prioritize sex, vacations, traffic lights, relationship cheating, jail and obviously duck sized horses. My poor mother takes a technology beating (and a verbal beat down by yours truly) as I try to teach her how to create a favorites link in her phone browser. Elizabeth Hurley is a topic for my get out of jail free card (all joking of course). 

The happiest f**king place on Earth

Episode 5 arrives (with some new intro music by Vancouver film school graduate j.d_mathews) and amazing stories of childhood memories from vacations and lazy afternoons hanging out at Grandma's house. Have you ever been to the 3 Sisters Volcano park or maybe shopped for Smurfs at the now defunct Pic N Save? Stories from our youth will transport you to these exotic locations but unlike us, you have the knowledge of knowing what insects to avoid and how to not be a dumbass.

Mmm, they like it

Episode #4 brings the conversation around to offensive humor and why it's okay. We talk about Cards against humanity, cutting people with scissors, and how a joke doesn't always hit its target audience. This time we wrap up the episode with questions about cucumbers, rape fantasy and what to do with your hands while going down on a guy.

He wasn’t an A$$hole

In the newest episode of the Answers For everything podcast, Teapot and Mr. Clay talk about cruise ship morgues, headstone messages, coffee table wrestlers and social media perception. We top it all off when we do a little self reflection while answering questions on bulges in grey sweat pants and age gap dating.

Pornhub, Tattoos and Sharting.... Oh My!

Teapot and I love getting tattoos and we will tell you why. Along the way we discuss the movie True Romance, travel and pornhub. We finish it up with some answers about sharting, men with small penises and sharing an ex-boyfriend between a mom and daughter.

The Swedish pear milkshake

Why is toilet paper hoarding a thing?. Is brushing your teeth while showering better than using your sink? How far would you go to please your partner? Do we wash our hair every time that we shower? What is better than a tampon or pad for a lady's special time? Listen to some audio and decide if it's someone going #1 or #2. Answers for all of these await in this week's episode. Plus, there is a bonus story about a mythical Pear Milkshake that can be found at McDonalds in Sweden.